By the Tree of Red Stars

Anointing on my head
By the tree of red stars
Ceasing to feel
Delusional.
Expected to rise up and
Fight for a cause
Greeted only by
Hesitation.
I was lost.
Justification, an absent presence.
Knowledge, known to give clarity
Lest you are troubled.
Me, myself, and I
Not knowing, if I should live through my faith
Opposing someone else’s choice
Pleading to make my own decisions.
Questioning myself
Regularly, was the hardest.
So many choices
Time to choose, not enough.
Understanding didn’t come easy,
Vile thoughts went
Without the understanding of from whence they came.
X-rayed, my thoughts laid out before me,
Yearning for a decision;
Zebra cakes and air, that’s all I need to get by

DeidreAnn